Family Feud
by Kira Chartrand
Summary: Loosely based off Intoxicated and therefore Florida vs. Robinson, Olivia gets too involved in a case and puts too much at risk. Shipping Huang/OMC, E/OFC, AO  initially , and maybe more later.
1. Chapter 1

_Olivia closed her phone, shutting it off, she couldn't risk someone else from SVU calling her right now. She turned off the main street down a side street, quickening her pace. It was evening, the sky was rapidly getting dark as the sun set, drawing long shadows out of the buildings. Olivia knew this wasn't protocol, but she didn't care, well, she did care, but she had already decided to meet her here. She couldn't just abandon Valessa, she knew what it was like to feel hopeless and alone, and she wouldn't let Valessa go through that when she had the power to help her. When Valessa had asked her for help._

_ Olivia took a deep breath, suddenly feeling really anxious, she wished there was an easier way. She hurried along, stepping over discarded newspapers that rustled in the vespertine wind. She reached the end of her shortcut. Olivia peered out onto Clancey Ave to a well-trafficked nighttime coffee shop called The Night Shift, where she had told Valessa to meet her._

_ Olivia looked at her watch. 7:52. She was early. Olivia hesitated, and decided to loiter in the cover of the alley and wait for Valessa to arrive, who had frantically called her an hour before and begged to meet with Olivia as soon as possible. Olivia had literally no free time, but agreed out of her empathy and understanding._

_ These were the cases that Olivia hated the most. She could deal with criminals, sex offenders, pedophiles, rapists, anyone, so long as her hard work put them away no questions asked. But as soon as politics and bureaucracy began to get in the way and prevent perps from getting what they deserved, that's when Olivia began to cut corners, even if it frequently meant at her own risk. Sometimes at the risk of just her job, sometimes at the risk of more. Valessa was one of these cases. Valessa was only seventeen, and fortunately so, because if she had been any farther away from reaching the legal status of an adult she would have run away a long time ago and gotten into who knows what kind of trouble._

_ There she is, Olivia thought, as Valessa's form materialized from beyond The Night Shift, approaching cautiously. Olivia left the cover of the alley to greet her, not sure of what to expect. From what she knew of Valessa's life, well, absolutely anything could be on the table right now._

_ "Valessa," Olivia started, once close enough._

_ "Oh thank god," Valessa replied quickly. "Olivia, I- Olivia-" Valessa rushed up to Olivia and embraced her, shaking._

_ "Valessa, Valessa, calm down, it's all right honey, what's wrong, just calm done," Olivia soothed, attentively massaging Valessa's back._

_ "It's… It's…."_

_ "Just breath, honey, breath."_

_ Valessa composed herself, and stepped back, looking at Olivia. Olivia could see that she was terrified. "Something, something bad has happened," Valessa finally stammered, "I've… I've done something really bad."_

_SPECIAL VICTIMS UNIT_

**One week earlier.**

Olivia got up and left her desk. Elliot had just left to grab some food so she had a chance to do what she had been putting off for so long. Olivia walked towards the elevators, determined to speak to Huang. She was nervous, but she had to follow through with this. A few months ago Huang had come out to announce that he was gay, after meeting a man whom he had hit it off with and starting dating, Zach McArthur. The team had been surprised to hear about Huang's orientation, because it came as such an unexpected shock, especially from the psychologist who should be such an advocate of self expression.

Well, that turned out to be the reason Olivia was seeking Huang's advice. She had been sorting out her feelings for so long, but by now she was sure of her it.

"Damnit," Olivia said under her breath, unsure of why this was causing her so much distress. She stepped off to the side and took a deep breath ten feet before the elevator door, mentally recuperating.

'I hunt down and arrest some of the worst of the worst criminals, and yet I'm scared of what my partner and friends will think if I come out. Damnit Olivia pull yourself to-' Olivia's inner dialogue ceased as the elevator doors opened and Alex Cabot stepped forward. Olivia's chest became tight, and she simply stood frozen as the attractive lawyer walked swiftly forward.

"Hello Olivia," Alex greeted her. "How's work going today?"

"Uh, um… fine, yeah, fine." Olivia stuttered in reply, shamming a smile on her face. "How's your work?"

"Busy as hell as usual and getting busier, my respect for your beloved Casey Novak grows everyday." Alex laughed and smiled, and continued, "all right, see you around Liv!"

"Right, see you." Olivia took a deep breath as the butterflies left her stomach. Olivia clenched her fists, she couldn't stand her situation. Yes, she was crushing on Alex Cabot, she couldn't deny it any longer. First the daughter of a rapist, now gay, what next, mutant children? She couldn't stand always being so singled-out by her fate like that. She suddenly became irritated and angry at herself for thinking that she could just 'talk to Huang about it and everything would be butterflies and flowers.' She did need to talk to Huang first to admit that she was lesbian, and second to discuss her feelings for Alex, and third to decide what the hell to do about it all, but she couldn't stand the stress of it all right now. Like some many times before, Olivia whipped around to storm away from her problems as if anger could evaporate them all away.

"Oof," Olivia blubbered as she collided straight into George Huang's crisp orange dry-cleaned dress shirt. The pair stumbled about, as George precariously attempted to balance the clipboard and papers he was carrying, momentarily suspending them in the air before they spun out of his hand and across the hallway, clattering about.

"George I am so sorry!" The contrite Olivia burst out, rushing to collect the mess.

"Oh, it's all right, just a lot of psyc evals, don't worry yourself over it," George replied. "Nothing important," he winked.

Olivia was glad George was so gracious. He had always been tactful and kind, but even more so after meeting Zach, and even, dare she say, a little more flamboyant, and growing at that. His shirt _was_ bright orange. That would never have happened with the old George.

As they gathered the papers together George said, "oh and Olivia, it's perhaps good that I ran into you- or, you into me- I just came from Cragen's office. He was looking for you. He said, and I quote, 'I told those damn idiot detectives that their lunch breaks DO NOT COINCIDE, what I am supposed to do when we have an urgent case and they're both out cramming their faces!'"

Olivia's face tensed into a skittish medley of different features. "Oh jeez, I didn't even- I was just… Oh damn it all! George, I need to talk to you about something, sometime, err.. soon, I guess." There she had said it. It was out.

"Of course, Olivia, you know you can schedule times to speak with my about your work anytime you need it," George replied nonchalantly.

Damn it, Olivia thought, he didn't understand what she meant at alll. "Err.. well, this is, a, more personal matter."

"Oh," George said surprised, "well that's fine as well, what do you say to coffee tomorrow afternoon around three, if getting away from the office will make you feel more comfortable?"

"Um, yes, that would be fine, great actually!" Olivia said, realizing that so much of her trepidation stemmed from being near the people she was afraid of being judged by. "Yes, tomorrow at three, at… The Coffee Bean?"

"Certainly," George replied positively, "now get off your lunch break!"

"Oh, right!" Olivia whirled and bolted back towards her office. She hadn't even considered what her momentary absence would look like, she had only planned to be gone for a minute or two. Well, she was glad that she had finally talked to Huang, one way or another. Reaching the office space Olivia sped in to be greeted by a rising whistle from Munch's desk, and an "oooohhhh she's in for it" from Fin.

"I'll deal with you two later," Olivia murmured discretely, turning to Cragen's door.

"Wait, don't-" Fin began, but Olivia had already turned the handle on Cragen's door, only to meet an arching, colorful hat, bordered with wispy golden curls of hair turning to reveal a middle-aged woman, and now exposed behind her, a pair of fuming Don Cragen eyeballs. The eyeballs said enough, and Olivia quickly muttered an apology and stepped back out.

"That's Ms. Eldridge," Fin said slyly, as if to imply that the subject of his sentence could hear him through the wall and would pounce on him. "She's got some old history with the boss, and she _would _have been talking to you about her daughter but you decided to book it out of her just before she walked in."

"What? Why couldn't either of you talk with her?" Olivia inquired, gesturing at Munch and Fin incredulously.

"Well, the Johnson case is top-priority, and Cragen didn't want to divert us," Fin winked, "all right, Munch, what've you got?"

Munch turned away from his computer screen and threw an overly cautious glance at Cragen's door. "Okay, turns out Ms. Eldridge and the cap went to college together at NYU, in 1978, graduating class of '82."

"Whew…" Fin whistled, "the man IS old."

"and, get this, both were in the accelerated Honors Program, which spent all four summers on special alternate educational trips. I'll bet there's some old-time romance between the two of them!" Munch chuckled.

Fin laughed heartily, "good work pal," they clocked their knuckles together.

Olivia's eyebrows were raised, "okay…. top priority Johnson case? Give me a break guys, if I wasn't so concerned with saving my own ass in a minute I would so tell Cragen about this, and you'd both be in for it."

"Speaking of your own ass…" Munch said, and Olivia looked at him, wide-eyed. Munch would never say something so… "Turn around princess," he continued.

Spinning, Olivia saw that the infamous Ms. Eldridge had risen and was departing from the office. Olivia quickly stepping to the side to avoid any sort of interaction with her- she had the overall impression that this was a very unpleasant woman- and waited for her to leave.

Ms. Eldridge opened Cragen's door and stepped out, the wide brim of her outrageous hat leading the way. In addition to her headgear, she sported a blue skirt and fluffy white snowball coat, an altogether excessively extravagant outfit. Her clothing was so immoderate that Olivia thought her range of her vision would be limited to a small wedge in front of her eyes, which were guarded by silver spectacles, but apparently this was not the case, because the flashy women stopped and rotated to stare cynically at Olivia, before pouting her lip and marching out of the office. Olivia nodded, unsure of what to make of that but sure she had made a sour first impression on that women.

"O-LIV-I-A!" Cragen's voice boomed forth, once Ms. Eldridge had departed. Olivia rushed in, apologizing effusively.

"Captain, I'm sorry, I haven't been out I lunch, I would never cross your-" Cragen's upheld hand and iron face silenced her.

"Olivia, I will overlook your absence as long as you handle this case and prevent me from ever having to personally deal with that woman again."

"Um, yes, Captain."

"All right, good, here's the case. Ms." Cragen grimaced, "Eldridge, has a complaint about her daughter's boyfriend. She claims that he has raped her. I did not press for details but I can assume that any intercourse was probably consensual, but at that most likely never even occurred. Frankly, though, I really don't give a damn, I just want you to sort out her childish issues and ask Alex to get a restraining order keeping her away from the precinct, that is, me."

"Got it," Olivia affirmed, eager to return to Cragen's good side. "Although, I can't guarantee the restraining order part."

"Sure, just do your best." Wow, Cragen must really dislike this women, Olivia thought.

She left his office and was ready to leave for the Eldridge's when Elliot returned, carrying a bag of Chinese Take-Out.

"Hey Liv, what'd I miss?" He asked casually.

"Um, a LOT." Olivia replied. "And, El, Chinese Take-Out, again?"

"What?" He replied, an expression of innocence on his face. "You don't like?"


	2. Chapter 2

Okay, Author's Note that I forgot to include on Ch. 1: This story is loosely based off of Intoxicated, which Dick Wolf based off the case The State of Florida vs. Valessa Lyn Robinson (1998). I will obviously be adopting some names and events from these sources, but I still don't own SVU. Also, the plot and events of _Family Feud_ are completely fictional in and of themselves. Regarding relationships: George Huang is gay and has a boyfriend, Olivia is gay but no one knows and she is struggling to deal, Elliot is dating Selena Mercy (OFC; Kathy DOES NOT EXIST), and as for the others you'll have to wait and see! This story may/may not be continued as a series. Okay, I think that's it. I still don't own anything, and please! If you read it review, even if you don't like it! I'd like to hear any feedback. And thank you so much if you do review, reviews make my day! =D

ok, anyways... Here's Ch. 2.

DOINK DOINK

Olivia arrived at the Eldridge residence and knocked on the door. The house was an immaculate white and the front yard was neatly organized into perfect little flowerbeds bordered with ornate decorative statues. Olivia upturned her nose just looking at it, it was all far to sterile. It reminded her of the houses she had seen that they tested nuclear weapons on, the picturesque little townhouses with mannequin families of four, just waiting to be incinerated…

"Who is it?" Ms. Eldridge's voice croaked from the interior.

"Detective Benson, SVU, I'm here to talk to you about your complaint."

The dead bolt clicked open, and the door opened slowly. "Yes, well, it's about time you showed up. Unfortunately, you're too late."

"Wha- Ms. Eldridge what do you mean?"

"What I mean is, that I am in my best mood right after my morning cup of tea, which I have already had. Had you been available when I visited your office, maybe I could have spoken with you, god knows I wasn't going to present my problem to that old dust-plate Donny."

Olivia didn't know what to make of this reasoning. "Well, all right," she said carefully, "should I come back tomorrow?"

"Yes you very well should," Ms. Eldridge snapped. "10:30 on the dot is when I'll expect you."

"Well, thank you Ms. Eldridge I'll be here then."

"Good day Detective." The final click of the dead bolt ended their conversation.

Olivia raised her eyebrows and stood there for a moment before turning away.

"Did you call the police!" Came an incensed voice from inside the house. Olivia stopped. "Mom I can't believe-" "Just go to your room and don't question my decisions ever again!" "You know what! I've had about enough of your bull-" Silence, Olivia turned around, and tried to peer through the opaque glass panels next to the door, but she could make out nothing. It seemed like Ms. Eldridge had slapped whoever was back-talking her, who Olivia assumed was her daughter. "Err-ah! You son of a bitch!" Came the younger voice, shattering the silence. Olivia heard a crash, followed momentarily by a slamming door from the second floor of the house, and then more silence. Hesitating, Olivia couldn't decide if she should knock on the door again, or if Ms. Eldridge would bite her face off. She made up her mind to wait a moment to see if the heated argument would continue, but after the house remained silent Olivia decided it was safe to leave.

SVU SVU SVU

Olivia and Elliot were packing up their things in a side room at the precinct.

"So how did your visit with Ms. Eldridge go?" Elliot inquired.

"Horrible." Olivia said. "She told me to return tomorrow after she has her _morning cup of tea_. The old dirt bag."

"Hm. Someone's a little heated?"

"Well, she was just terse and rude, her house is too neat, her clothing is just one huge faux pas, and when I was leaving I heard her get into an argument with her daughter, which seemed to turn violent. Elliot I just can't stand it when parent's are assholes to their children."

"Yeah, I see. What's her beef with her daughter?"

"I don't know, Cragen mentioned something about accusing her boyfriend of raping her, but didn't give me any other details, and clearly neither did the girl's mom. There's some tension between Ms. Eldridge and Cragen."

"Yeah, Munch told me about that," Elliot said.

"Well, I'm going back to see her tomorrow, maybe I can figure some of this out."

"Good luck with that. I'll heading out to meet Selena for dinner, so I'll see you tomorrow Liv."

"Oh! Ok, have a good night!" Elliot had been dating Selena Mercy for three months now, and their relationship had been going really well. They had meet while SVU was investigating a case where a rape victim had turned up dead near the docks; Selena was the one who first saw her and called the police. She was a sailor and alternately ran a ferry or her small fishing enterprise, with a dilettantish interest in treasure hunting, which she entertained from time to time on the weekends. The precinct had an ongoing joke that treasure hunting was not the only thing being entertained on these weekend ventures, of which Elliot had been a part of recently.

Olivia was a little jealous of Elliot's new romance, not because she liked Elliot (God forbid!) but merely because she had no one. But that wasn't quite it, the real cause of her envy was that Elliot was free to seek out relationships, while Olivia's true romantic interests were still unknown to anyone but herself. She just wanted to be normal. She still wasn't completely happy with being gay, because there was so much stigma associated with homosexuality. Hell, a good portion of SVU's cases dealt with homosexual abuse, discrimination or violence. Olivia didn't want herself to be associated with these things. But then again Huang had been doing so well since he came out… Well, she was dealing with it, she would be seeing him tomorrow and talking through all of this with him. Well, that was the plan at least.

Olivia shut her locker and heaved a sigh, hoping that this would be all over soon. She gathered her things and headed back to the main part of the precinct.

Fin had left but Munch was still at his desk working on something, and Cragen was still in his office. Olivia was going to bid them farewell before retiring but then Alex Cabot walked in again.

"Hey guys guess what I just heard?" Alex announced.

"What is it?" Munch said, looking up from his work.

"The one and only Casey Novak just finished her closing arguments on the Victor v. Maryville case this morning, so she'll be back here to work soon!"

"That's fantastic!" Munch and Olivia exclaimed in unison. Alex Cabot had replaced Casey two or three months ago because the DA's office had needed Casey on a special case. SVU was all sad to see her go, but she would be back as soon as the case was finished. Alex Cabot had fit in well with the SVU team, and didn't seem bothered by the fact that they all couldn't wait for their previous lawyer to return.

The defense lawyer had quit the case out of fear, but Casey Novak was not one to be intimidated. Victor, the defendant, was accused of larceny and the rape of a Maryville Chemical Corp. employee, and it turned out that he was indeed guilty. However, he was threatening in his defense to divulge some secrets about the chemical company which evoked untraceable hate-mail and threats to his defense lawyer, who subsequently quit. In her investigation, Casey had succeeded not only in pinning Victor of rape, but of also shrewdly extracting the truth concerning Maryville's under the table deals with a foreign Chinese exporter, bringing justice to them both, although she too became the victim of some vicious hate-mail.

SVU of course had heard of Casey's triumphs and was very proud of their redheaded legal champion.

"Yeah, she shut down those lice at Maryville Corp, AND Victor Daugherty, she is really being praised everywhere. The DA even offered her a promotion but she insisted on returning to Sex Crimes."

"Wow? We mean that much to her, huh?" Munch asked, proudly.

"Well, I don't know about you in particular, John, but I do think she really loves you guys." Alex said.

Olivia was glad to hear that Casey was returning, but that meant that Alex would be leaving. She suddenly felt a twinge of despair inside her, in a way she had taken Alex's presence for granted. Even though she would just be working cases in a different precinct Olivia would still miss her dearly.

_Oh what the hell am I thinking_, Olivia thought to herself. She looked at the gorgeous blond in front of her. _Olivia there is no way this lovely blond will ever turn out to be gay, and even if she did, even less of a chance she would fall for you. She's leaving SVU shortly and that will probably be the last you see of her. So why don't you just stop kidding yourself and get on with your life._

"Olivia what's with the frown? Aren't you happy Casey's returning?" Alex said, interrupting her thoughts.

"Oh, um, yes, yes of course! It's just that, well, now we'll all miss you, that's all!" Olivia said in explanation.

"Awwh, well I'll sure miss you all!"

_Not like I'll miss you_, Olivia thought quietly.

"Well, I guess I should tell the cap." Alex said. She walked over and hugged Olivia, which sent Olivia's hormones cascading about inside her, and then headed over to inform the captain of the good news. Olivia stood there for a second before grabbing her things and leaving the office, not wanting to have to face Alex again for fearing of revealing her emotions. Olivia's eyes were wet as she walked out.

SVU SVU SVU

Olivia walked home that night alone, trying to sort through her feelings. She usually walked when she had something to think through, the purposeful motion let her body rest so her mind could wander through what was bothering her. She also liked the distraction the undying city offered, the traffic and commerce, the gleaming lights of buildings and bill boards, it made her relieved to know that even if she was forlorn at least the rest of the world was still turning.

_Why am I so afraid of the team finding out that I'm gay? _Olivia questioned herself. _It's not that I'm a wimp, my whole life I've been bold and unafraid of challenges! Why does this deter me? I put away sex offenders for god's sake!_

Olivia trudged onward, exasperated. Sometimes answers weren't very easy, sometimes she just never found them.

_ Maybe it is because of our work. To SVU sex offenders are all scum, hands down. Maybe I am just associating the public opprobrium surrounding homosexuality with sex offenders too much, and afraid that my friends will look upon me like that. Will look upon me like I look upon homosexuals, or at least some of the perverted homosexuals we've prosecuted. But you know they won't judge you like that! _Olivia's indignant defense of her friends rose up involuntarily. _Maybe it is that simple, maybe I'm not as strong as I want myself to be, maybe I am really just afraid of being seen badly. Maybe I just want acceptance like so many other people. _This thought had crossed Olivia's mind many times, especially because of her unfortunate upbringing. Acceptance was the one thing that she had never really had, not like everyone else had, and being gay only made it worse.

Olivia shook her head. 'Whatever, I'm not gonna go and drink myself to sleep or eat chocolate. I'm gonna go home and eat dinner, feed Shura, and go to bed, and tomorrow I'm gonna deal with this by talking to Huang about it.'

She did talk to herself from time to time like this, in encouragement. She didn't think of it as a sign of insanity, just a natural coping method with the type of work she was in.

_Right. I'm not crazy, not crazy, just a little lonely, that's all, a little lonely. _Olivia thought to herself as she reached her apartment complex and headed inside. _And the that's why I have Shura, my little solace from loneliness._

Olivia entered her apartment to find her dark brain kitten eagerly awaiting her arrival. When she was late in getting home Shura was always anxious to see her.

"Hey there my little precious friend!" Olivia said, scooping up the adorable feline creature into her arms. "How have you been today?" Shura purred happily and rubbed her fluffly face against Olivia's. "You're gonna get some tuna tonight, that ch'u are! Yum yum yum!" Shura continued to purr as Olivia carried her into the kitchen and proceeded to prepare their dinners.

Review please!


	3. Chapter 3

Here's Ch. III, it's a little long. If you read, review it! Also- thanks so much to all who have reviewed I love you guys and you make my day! =D

George Huang was roused by a weighted form pressing down against him.

"Mhm… It's late, what took you so long baby?" George asked.

"Work ran late tonight, some mis-addressed packages," Zach McArthur answered him. "But that doesn't matter now, does it? We've still got a couple hours until the sun comes up." Zach pressed himself down fully against George, whose body shuddered in response. George was groggy but soon fully awake as he embraced his lover and they kissed passionately, violently, the pair twisting about under the sheets of his bed.

George began working at Zach's shirt, pulling it off deftly, having become more circumspect after ripping two of his other shirts in his haste. The bed convulsed with their movements, Zach dug his teeth into George's neck, pinching his flesh.

"Ahhh…" George moaned in exhalation and endured the painful euphoria for a moment before gently pulling away. "Careful now, remember I've got to present myself in a professional environment in five hours."

"Right," Zach said, withdrawing and eyeing his partner seductively. "I guess I'll have to be more discrete then." And with that Zach pulled the blanket over them both and attacked George's hidden features.

SVU SVU SVU

Olivia's eyes snapped open. She was lying in bed. Alone. She turned toward her bedside table. 4:30a.m. Damn, it was early, too early to get up but she was probably not going to be able to fall asleep again.

It had been so real. Alex had been next to her, they had come home together after work. Olivia couldn't remember how it happened but they had ended up in her bed, writhing together in passion. It had been so real, so gratifying. Alex's body pressed against hers, admitting her many repressed feelings. The feeling of being free, forgetting all of her fears and embracing that hot blond. And then, consciousness. The all too clear vividness of reality, cutting through and blasting apart her erotic reverie. The heavy, cold sheets on top of her. The bleak interior of her apartment, which hadn't seen another human being for months. The steady, mechanical clicking of the alarm clock next to her. The movement of the clouds beyond her window. The details that proved to her that she was awake, that it was just a dream, nothing more, just her hidden hopes emerging from the depths of her subconscious.

She sat up, exhausted at the futility of suppressing her yearnings. She wasn't tired, she was emotionally wired. She had moved from being turned on to indignant in a matter of seconds and there was no way in hell she was going to fall asleep again. She kicked her comforter off and got out of bed, putting on sweatpants and a sweatshirt and walked over to the window. The glass was cold to the touch, like it always was in the cold of winter, which, in New York City, was most of the year. Olivia liked the cold, ice-like feeling it imparted to her, she imagined the chill seeping through her and freezing the movement of her emotions, preventing her from feeling what she knew she couldn't resist.

"Meow."

Shura's greeting came softly from around her feet. Olivia looked down to find the warm fur-ball circling her feet, her tail gently playing against her shins.

"Meow." Shura stopped and looked up at Olivia, her bluish eyes twinkling in the dim light. Olivia thought back to the evening she had found Shura. She was returning to Alissa Thompson's apartment to examine a book she owned, which very likely was imprinted with her rapists fingerprints, when she turned to find Shura alone in a corner sweetly and helplessly looking up at Olivia. Olivia remembered moving towards Shura and frightening her away; it took her nearly an hour to pacify the terrified kitten.

"But you're safe now, yes you are!" Olivia said, picking up the animal and caressing her. Shura had been harshly injured by Alissa's attacker, and had hidden herself in a cabinet so well that not even the crime scene techs had found her. Alissa Thompson had succumbed to her injuries in the emergency room after giving Olivia the vital clue that when she had come home she found the man who attacked her sitting next to her bookshelf reading _We _by Yevgeny Zamyatin. Olivia had indeed found his fingerprints on the cover, but was heartbroken over the forlorn Shura, and decided to take the cat with her.

That was a few months ago, and Shura soon moved from occupying SVU desk space to Olivia's apartment, where she now lived permanently, to Olivia's surprised satisfaction. _I would never have sought out a pet on my own, it's just not something I'm interested in. But I'm so glad I found you. I can't believe such a small animal like you can make such a big difference. _Olivia carried the purring bundle of fur into her living room and flicked on the television.

"Well, let's see what kind of early morning droll we can find to pass the time with."

SVU SVU SVU

Five hours later Olivia approached again the impeccably spotless Eldridge residence, timing her appearance meticulously to coincide exactly with her appointed time. She looked at her watch. 10:29:45. Close enough. She rapped her hand against the hard wood of the door.

After some delay it was opened to reveal Ms. Eldridge in a yet another tawdry outfit. Olivia tried to distract herself from the fluorescent colors of Ms. Eldridge's coat and her too-neat hairstyle.

Olivia said, "good morning Ms. Eldridge," while she thought, _Jesus woman it's ten in the morning why would you possibly be dressed like that?_

"Well good morning Detective. Please, join me for some tea." Ms. Eldridge beckoned her inside, closing the door behind her.

_I can only wonder what kind of vile chemicals you poor into your tea, and like hell I'm going to drink some._

Ms. Eldridge lead her into the kitchen. "I have mint on Thursdays, steamed with beet roots. It's an ancient Chinese recipe supposed to promote longevity."

_More like an ancient Chinese torture, I bet._

"Here, please have some." She poured a glass of the steaming green beverage, and Olivia's stomach tightened. Olivia took the glass and pretended to be politely waiting for it to cool, while she was really waiting for an opportunity to ditch the cup somewhere.

"So, Ms. Eldridge, what-"

"Oh my, your eyes look a little red, and your posture is all wrong honey, straighten that back up." Olivia blinked, unsure if this lady was really talking to her. Ms. Eldridge was staring straight at her but Olivia didn't know if she had heard her properly.

"And your fingernails! My god. Look here, my dear, you've got to take care of yourself better than that. Here." Ms. Eldridge spun around and pulled out a vial from her purse. "This is a medieval Florentine remedy for fingernail degeneration, you know, in their day the Medici paid a high price for this stuff! Here, take it please." Ms. Eldridge shoved it towards Olivia.

_Why don't I cram this con-liquid down your throat, you obtrusive old hag._

"Um… Ms. Eldridge, I'm really fine, thank you. I came to talk to you about your daughter."

"Oh, yes, that b-… Yes, Valessa. Well, come on then, I may as well show you in person."

"Show me in person, what do you mean Ms. Eldridge? Is something wrong?"

"Oh, why yes, something is wrong. I told Donny yesterday that I was tired of calling the police and getting a 'we'll check on it' followed by weeks of nothing. It was really a stroke of luck, or rather the fortune of my new Indian charm bracelet-" she flashed her wrist up, which was clad in a god-awful gleaming circlet- "that I came to know that Donny is a policeman. Not that I ever wanted to speak to that schmuck again but I had to this time, no one else would listen, and what does he tell me! 'I'll have one of my agents look into it.' Like hell he will, I _told_ him I would take things into my own hands if I had to."

_Dear. God. You. Are. Deranged._

"So I catch my daughter and her boyfriend again last night. That is, him _raping_ her. You brought your handcuffs right?" Ms. Eldridge gestured to Olivia's waist. Olivia hesitated, unaccustomed to being ordered around by unpleasant civilians. "Well, did you?" She snapped again.

"Yes, I have my handcuffs. Ms. Eldridge, what is this about?"

"It's about you arresting my daughter's rapist, honey." They had reached the top of the stairs and Ms. Eldridge reached forward and unlocked a bedroom door. She lead Olivia in to find a young boy, his hands tied behind him. The boy looked up pleadingly. He was standing in front of the bed; the arrangement of his bonds preventing him from enjoying a more leisurely position. He looked from Ms. Eldridge to Olivia and back to Ms. Eldridge.

"Jesus, woman, are you going to let me go now?" He entreated.

_What. The. Hell. _Olivia thought.

Ms. Eldridge stepped forward, "listen here you little twerp-"

"Okay, stop." Olivia commanded. "What the hell is going on here?"

"I caught this-"  
"She locked me the fuck in this room all night-" The boy's voice elevated, and triggered a response from across the house.

"Johnny! God are you ok! What's she doing-"

"Shut up you bitch!" Ms. Eldridge hollered, whirling in the direction of the voice.

"Okay. Everyone calm down!" Olivia shouted. She gestured to the boy, speaking to Ms. Eldridge sharply, "all right, first, you release him," and then to the boy, "you stay here and keep quiet while Ms. Eldridge tells me what happened." Ms. Eldridge glared out her. "Now. Ms. Eldridge."

As Ms. Eldridge turned they heard a splintering crack from down the hallway followed by a series of yelps and then the appearance of a teenage girl at the doorway.

The boy was the first to speak, "Valessa!" He exclaimed.

"Johnny!"

"No, you look here!" Ms. Eldridge moved toward her, grabbing her arms to try to pin her down. The girl started struggling and yelling and fighting back desperately, but willpower alone cannot win every battle.

"Valessa!" The boy repeated. "Get your dirty hands off her you louse!"

_Fuck_. Olivia whipped out her walkie talkie, "This is Benson, I need backup at my location now, repeat, send backup now." She clicked it off and moved in on the warring mother and daughter. "All right! All right, break it up, come on now, break it up." Olivia slowly pried the two apart. "Now look! If we're going to get anywhere I need you all to calm the hell down! Now, Ms. Eldridge, return downstairs, right now."

"Well I never-"

"Ms. Eldridge, get your ass downstairs!" Olivia was irate at this insubordinate witch. "And you, Valessa, I need you to move back to your room and stay there. Okay? Don't worry I'm going to release your boyfriend and you're all coming back with me to the station."

"What?" The girl responded, "but we didn't do anything!"

Olivia's flaming eyes silenced her and she backed off. Olivia finally proceeded to untie Johnny's bonds, which consisted of spare ropes wrapped and tied countless times between his wrists and the bed post.

"Oh, and Detective!" Ms. Eldridge's voice called from the bottom of the stairs. "I'm very unhappy with your performance, I want my fingernail vial return-"

The door behind her came unhinged as Elliot Stabler's foot dislodged it, effectively knocking over and concealing Ms. Eldridge in one violent motion. Elliot swung his gun around calling, "Olivia!"

"Fuck! Elliot! Calm down!" Olivia called, not believing what she had seen. "I didn't say to break the door down!"

Elliot looked about, abashed, and lowered his firearm.

"My… lawyer… is going to have a thing or two… to say about _this_." Ms. Eldridge croaked as she pushed the door off of her.

SVU SVU SVU

A couple of hours later a combination of Elliot, Fin, Munch, and far too much patience had extracted the truth out of the entangled Eldridge's and Valessa's boyfriend. Cragen was holed up in his office to remain incognito so the detectives had to review the evidence in there.

"So it seems like a plain 'ol case of teenage romance to me," said Fin, who interviewed Johnny. "Doesn't even sound like they had sex. The girl falls for the guy, its the first time for both of them and they're too obsessed with each other anyway to do much more than lay in bed together."

"Valessa agrees," said Munch, "she insists they never had sex and she only snuck Johnny into her room some nights. I think she's telling the truth."

"Ms. Eldridge, however," says Elliot, "insists that Johnny's banging her daughter, and yet she's the only one supporting that view. Cap I say she's off her rocker."

"Well I could tell you that much without having to drag Romeo and Juliet in here," says the Captain, "the question is what the hell do we do with them?"

"Captain, Ms. Eldridge is seriously unstable psychologically, she locked both of these kids into their rooms for an entire night. That's kidnapping at the least. It would take very little to push her to physical violence."

"Maybe. Munch do the kids want to press charges?"

"They seem unconcerned they just want to be able to see each other. Johnny asked me every other minute if he could see Valessa already."

"Well the most we can do to verify Ms. Eldridge's accusations is have Valessa examined to determined if she's had intercourse or not. Olivia, if Ms. Eldridge insists on it, take Valessa to Mercy and have them examine her."

Olivia raised her eyebrows and said reluctantly, "all right Captain."

SVU SVU SVU

"So, do I really have to do this?"

"Yes, sweetheart, your mother is your parent, and as awful as it is she has the authority here."

Valessa crossed her arms and fumed. She wasn't happy at all when she was told she had to go with Olivia to the hospital for a 'rape examination.'

"I told you all we didn't have sex why can't you just believe us."

"Honey, trust me, we do believe you, but like I said, your mom's calling the shots."

"Fuck that," Valessa said, "she has no right to tell me what to do. I'll be 18 in half a year and then I'm the fuck outta here."

"With Johnny?" Olivia questioned.

"Yes, with Johnny. He _loves_ me at least, unlike her."

"Valessa," Olivia said slowly, "you may not think your mother loves you, and I'm not here to pass judgment on that, but don't be so fast to change the course of your life. Where will your life lead if you move in with Johnny the day you're 18?"

"Move in? Ha! He's as feed up with my mom as I am. He's says that as soon as I'm an adult we're driving away from New York, somewhere far away where _she_ can't find us so we can be together."

"Valessa you can't hate your mother _that_ much?" Olivia knew parents could be true assholes sometimes, and Ms. Eldridge seemed to be a shining example of one, but still, could the bond between a parent and child be turned completely from love to hate?

"_That _much? I guess you cops didn't ask her about what she's done to me? Huh? Well I'll tell you. One time I forgot to put away her fucking herbal remedy kit, and she came TO my school, INTO my classroom, and in front of all my peers during class, chewed me out for it. I'm sure you can imagine how that looked and how quickly the news flew through the school. 'Little Valessa, put away your mother's herbs yet?'" Valessa mocked, "'Hey Valessa, how's your mother doing lately? I hope you didn't botch her pedicure again!' The taunts went on forever. And as if that wasn't enough she slapped me when I got home, didn't let me eat dinner _and _grounded me. I fucking hate her."

"God, Valessa I'm so sorry," Olivia said, genuinely disturbed. "Valessa, has your mother hit you frequently?"

"It's off and on. I've learned to appease her enough to protect myself, or maybe now I'm getting old enough that she might be afraid I'll fight back one day."

_I doubt there's enough to build a case on child abuse_, thought Olivia. She had really started to detest Ms. Eldridge, but in situations like these there was very little anyone could do because's of a parents sovereign right to their children. Sometimes Olivia really hated the legal system. And sometimes, like now, she broke protocol because of it.

"Look, Valessa honey. I know this is out of place and may not change anything, but I'm not going to tell you to deal with it just because she's your mother. I don't know why she's like that but it's awful and wrong, and I'm terribly sorry you have to go through what you do. For whatever it's worth, you can call me anytime you need anything or want to talk, and I'll do everything I can to help you."

Valessa was quiet for a second, and Olivia glanced at her. It looked like she was trying to suppress tears.

Valessa sniffled and as she began to speak the tears rolled down her cheeks. "Th-thank you, um… Detec-"

"Olivia," Olivia said simply.

"Olivia. Thank you Olivia." Valessa looked deeply down at her hands. "No one has ever offered me understanding, no adults have at least. Johnny's always been there, but adults always act like I'm the one at fault." She tilted her head back and sighed painfully.

It strained Olivia's heart to see this sweet girl in a state like this. To be forced to drive her to be probed by a doctor against her will just because her deluded mother wanted it done. To be unable to do anything but offer a help that she would probably never really be able to give. To be powerless against the tyranny of a blind political system that doesn't see hearts but bows to the dollar and age.

Olivia knew Valessa was the one suffering but Olivia couldn't help but fight to restrain her own tears. She was actually glad that they had reached the hospital so the purposeful motion of a task would distract her from the pain of seeing Valessa's suffering.

SVU SVU SVU

An hour later the doctor returned to Valessa's room, Olivia next to her.

"It's a negative," he said, "absolutely no penetration or intercourse of any kind."

"I _told_ her," Valessa pouted.

"Come on, honey let's go," Olivia soothed, and the now amiable pair walked out together, with at least the clarity of hard science to throw in Ms. Eldridge's face. Science that wasn't biased to age, money, or affiliation.

2:48 read the hands of a clock off a wall.

_Damnit! _Olivia thought. _I've got to meet Huang in 12 minutes. Shit. I'll have to call him and tell him it will take me a little longer, I have to drive Valessa back first. _The tumultuous events of the day had distracted Olivia from the momentous conversation she had been putting off. But her confession was going to have to come, she had already decided that. She didn't know if she would ever have children. But she sure as hell wasn't going to become a rotten parent like Ms. Eldridge and ruin the life of a girl like Valessa. Like her own childhood had been wrecked by her mother's shame. And somehow dealing with her orientation was related to learning to be a good parent, Olivia knew it even if she didn't care to search out the connection.

_A child should not feel afraid to express who they really are inside._ Olivia thought. _And neither should I._

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	4. Chapter 4

a/n Guys I'm so sorry it's taken so long to post an update, I've been really busy with school and work lately. But I finally finished Ch. 4 and here it is, enjoy!

DOINK DOINK

"George I'm so sorry I'm late." It was 3:42. George looked up pleasantly and gestured for Olivia to sit down.

"It's not a problem Olivia I've just been enjoying the sunshine." The cafe was on the second floor of a plaza near the precinct. Below them roamed hoards of New York's busy-bee population, shoppers, executives, newspaper salesmen, hotdog vendors, businessman, students. George had selected a table near the edge, giving them a panoramic view of the rushing throngs of people who were filtering around an ornate fountain positioned in the middle of the plaza. The fountain was gushing water that sparkled and glinted in the crisp sunlight.

Olivia took a deep breath looking out at the busy scene below her and then turned to the more relaxed environment of the open-air coffee shop, seeing newspapers crinkled and children sipping child sizes drinks next to their business tailored mother or father.

"What was it that kept you?" George asked politely.

"What!" Olivia jumped. _God, why am I this tense, there is nothing to be worried about._ "I just had to drive a girl back to the precinct after an examination at the hospital," Olivia stammered. "Crazy mother, forced her to take a gynecological exam."

"Sure, I can imagine."

_Actually, it wouldn't be a bad idea to talk to Huang about Ms. Eldridge sometime, maybe he could provide some insight into her twisted mind._

"So, Olivia, why is it you wanted to talk to me today? It doesn't seem to be work-related but I'm glad to offer you advice all the same." Straight to the issue. That was like Huang, especially with those he knew well, no polite fillers or teatime conversation. Straight to the point.

_Oh god, here it was. _Olivia thought. _Why am I still so tensed? _Olivia thought back over all the years she had struggled with her feelings, slowly coming to learn that they weren't going to disappear. She had bought books about homosexuality, some arguing for how it was 'all genetic and not the person's choice' some arguing that homosexuality could be reversed- buying them shamefully amidst a stack of other novels so her cashier wouldn't know the real reason Olivia had come to the bookstore, or else ordering them through the secrecy of the internet so no one would know. Now those books had either been reduced to ashes in Olivia's fireplace or were rotting in a landfill somewhere as none of them lead Olivia to resolving her issues. And her bookshelves were packed with the fiction she had accumulated which she had never and probably would never read. And she still hadn't told another soul.

She had been through the chat rooms, the blogs, the online journals. Read accounts of other gay men and women, their advice or their travails. She had never worked up the guts to express her own feelings on any of those sites, she had read them only vicariously. Posting her own thoughts would mean accepting and validating them, a step Olivia wasn't ready to take; she had been trying to deny and suppress her urges for as long as she had been feeling them, hating what they signified. No matter what she read, nothing would shake her from the certainty that homosexuality wasn't natural, just like the vile urge to rape wasn't natural. Olivia despised that she loved women, that she _wanted_ women, because it was _wrong_, just like her father had been wrong when he raped her mother, just like her life had been wrong ever since then. Her homosexuality was just another why that _he_ was still hurting her. He had ruined her childhood; not only did she not have a father figure in her life, but her presence was a constant reminder of her mother's shame, and she was frequently neglected or mistreated. Then, as soon as she was older enough to be free of that, she began to have these strange urges, just another thing to separate her from everyone else, to prevent her from having a _normal_ life. Olivia had spent many nights depressed or filled with hate because of what seemed to her to be an utterly wretched fate.

To make matters worse, although Olivia was sorely and deeply affected by these things, she didn't feel like they were serious enough to tell anyone else about- although they broke her heart they would certainly not break anyone else's heart. She worked with victims of rape and horrible abuse everyday for crying out loud, of what worth were her romantic oddities among their tears?

_God damn it all, _Olivia thought. _I'm here aren't I? I've got to let all these misgivings go and just spit it out already._

"George," Olivia said resolutely but tremulously. "I'm a lesbian."

George's eyes widened slightly, but he knew not to express surprise or alarm. "Olivia," he said calmly, "am I the first person you've to this to?"

"Y-yes…" Olivia faltered, trying to withhold the tears that were so close to her eyes. _Why am I freaking out? I said it, it's done… Just calm down Liv, calm down._

"Liv, it's okay," said George, reaching out to take her hand in a comforting way to sooth her. "I imagine you've been fighting the need to admit this for a while now." Olivia nodded her head.

"In a way, I felt the same way before I came out. But, believe me, letting your friends know and risking rejection is better a thousand times over them keeping it bottled up inside and torturing yourself day after day. Besides, you'll find out who your true friends are. Some of the people I used to knew have completely avoided me since I told them I was gay, but, you know, in hindsight, I think I'm better off without their company."

Olivia hadn't thought of it that way before. She was also glad Huang was doing most of the talking because if she was to open her mouth she wouldn't be able to restrain her tears.

"Olivia, your feelings are not a thing to be ashamed over. They make you who you are, and you have to accept that if you're going to live happily."

"I-I know." Olivia finally said. "I was just so afraid of what everyone would think, and… and-" Olivia trailed off.

George looked at her inquisitively and then hazarded a guess at what was holding her tongue. "Do you," he said, "Olivia do you like someone you're working with?"

Olivia nodded again.

"I see," said Huang. "Olivia, it was really hard for me to deal with my feelings towards other men, because I would never know if they shared my affections. You probably think that you have no chance at all."

"Yes," Olivia said.

"Once you come out and tell everyone what your feelings are, I promise, if anyone shares those feelings they will tell you. Coming out, kind of, brings people to you, if you know what I mean."

"George… It's Alex Cabot… Do you… do you think I have any chance?"

"Honestly, Olivia, I don't know. But I can guarantee you that coming out will be your best way to know."

"Okay… It's just that, Casey's coming back soon, and I don't know if I'll see Alex at all any more after Casey returns."

"I understand. Confidence is one of the best traits you can have, especially if you're gay. If you want to tell the rest of the team I would recommend simply getting them all together and saying it. You don't need people going back each other's back starting rumors and gossiping, it's better to say it all yourself to their faces."

Olivia remembered back to when Huang had come out. _That's exactly what he had done_, Olivia thought. _And… no one had snubbed him. _Olivia felt a glimmer of hope. She may be able to do this after all.

She thought of Alex Cabot's flowing blond hair and her contagious smile. Olivia's heart pounded and her breath became short. _If at least for her, for that chance, maybe I can do it._

"George," Olivia said. "Thank you so much, this helps more than you know."

"Trust me, I know. If you want me to be there when you tell them, I can be. I think it may help."

"Okay, thanks George. I might actually go back to the precinct now, if everyone's there, this might be the time to tell them." Olivia said, setting down her untouched coffee and standing up.

"All right, why don't we walk back there together then?" Huang said brightly.

"Sure!" Olivia said, smiling.

They both stood up and Olivia glanced back at the still bustling plaza below them. She suddenly wondered how many other untold desires were hidden in the many minds she saw below. Minds like hers that had hidden away their thoughts for fear of being rejected by family or friends. Olivia shook off the thought and turned to go when a flash of light caught her attention. She squinted and looked closer, a shiny purse had just fallen to the ground. Olivia's gaze trailed up to the previous holder of the pursue, it was a fanciful lady with a billowing skirt and purple hat topped with a white feather. The purple hat jerked back and forth roughly. Olivia looked closer, there was someone on the other side of the women's hat but her hat was so large it was preventing Olivia from seeing them.

The women was shoved back and her hat fell off, revealing an irate Valessa Eldridge standing behind her. _Jesus!_ Olivia thought. She turned and said, "George get over here!"

George, who was now halfway across the patio turned and returned to Olivia's vantage point.

"Remember that girl I was talking about earlier? That's her," Olivia said, pointing, "and her mad-house mother fighting with her."

Ms. Eldridge was now screaming at Valessa, drawing the attention of the crowd all around, but Olivia and George couldn't make out what she was saying because the square was so noisy. Valessa was just standing there taking it, and Olivia couldn't decided if she was about to break and kick her mother in the face or burst into tears and run off. Apparently Valessa's pacificsm won out because a minute later Valessa turned and rushed through the crowd of onlookers, who, by their expressions clearly disapproved of Ms. Eldridge's behavior. Some even offered to help Valessa by the looks of it but she pushed them aside and ran until they couldn't see her anymore.

"That bitch-" Olivia said, clenching her fists.

"God, I see what you mean," Huang said. "Mother's like that are a disgrace."

"Huang, what can I do for the girl?"

George looked at her sympathetically, "Olivia, there's not much that you can do as long as her mother holds all the cards, which she does. Simply being there for her, being a _mother_ to her, is the best you can do."

Olivia pressed her lips together and didn't reply. She knew that was the reality but it was so hard, she wanted it to be like a normal case. Black and white, as simple as solving it and then kicking down the perp's door slamming his face against a wall and reading him his rights. But justice was not always that simple. _God damn it _Olivia thought.

"Come on Liv, let's walk back to the precinct," George offered.

SVU SVU SVU

It was 5:30. Everyone was gathered in Cragen's office. Olivia looked between their uncertain but reassuring faces. The faces of those who cared for Olivia but could not discern why she called this strange meeting.

Olivia looked from Elliot's unyielding face to Munch's concerned expression to Melinda's calm gaze. She saw the statuesque features of Cragen's face and Fin's rarely expressed compassionate look. She saw Casey Novak's bold, confident pose, and her flaming red hair. She saw George Huang's composed and encouraging smile. And finally she saw Alex Cabot's blond hair, and her brown eyes. She took a deep breath, _Okay here goes nothing _she thought.

"Guys…" Olivia said, "I'm gay."


	5. Chapter 5

Shura rubbed against Olivia's ankles gently and purred.

"You know Shura," Olivia said, "you might not want to get too close to me I'm a lesbian you know."

"Meow."

Olivia just shook her head and reached down to grab the fluffy warm bundle and set Shura in her lap. "You don't understand a word I'm saying do you?" Olivia laughed. She petted her purring kitten and sighed.

_I guess it didn't go too badly. They all supported me and accepted what I told them easily. Just like with Huang a few months ago._

Olivia thought back to the surprised expressions she was met with after her confession, which had quickly become reassuring support as soon as they regained their wits. Olivia was especially thankful for George, his presence had made everything easier, especially as everyone struggled to find the right words to say.

_But… Alex._

Casey had returned sooner than Olivia thought she would. She had been at the precinct that afternoon to greet everyone and announce that she would be returning the next day in place of Alex. Olivia's heart had skipped a beat when she heard that; she thought that Casey would wait at least a week for Alex to finish up her cases but Casey was ready to be thrown right in and no one was going to stop her. They all had missed Casey, it was true, but Olivia was going to miss Alex now even more.

As everyone departed a few hours earlier Alex had said goodbye to Olivia and given her a fleeting hug, a hug that signified to Olivia that Alex did not return her affections. This understanding made it all the harder to see Alex walk down the hallway and enter the elevator, but made it easier, in a way, because it eliminated the prolonged uncertainty Olivia had felt with regard to Alex.

_ Well, I'm just going to have to move on. It'll be easier to not see her constantly, at least, now that Casey has replaced her._

George had said to Olivia before leaving, "don't worry, you'll be able to find someone, I'm sure of it." Olivia hoped that was true.

She draped Shura across her shoulder and stood up to walk over to the kitchen. Her eating routine had improved after she became resolved to deal with her homosexuality. Before she would go through desert-gorging depressed phrases juxtaposed against periods of fasting where the deprivation of food fulfilled her need for self-harm. Despite her renewed efforts to eat better, however, her fridge was stocked pretty bleakly.

"Leftover Chinese, some apples, turkey, soda, not much to choose from," Olivia said to herself. "Well, how does some Chinese sound Shura?"

She pulled the carton of noodles and rice out and was about to microwave them when her a hand rapped on her door. Olivia looked up and walked over.

"Yes, who is it?"

"Um… It's me, Elliot."

"Oh," said Olivia, surprised, opening the door.

"Hey," he said. "Sorry for barging in unannounced like this. I just," he hesitated. Elliot was never very adept at expressing his feelings. "I just wanted to come by and say I think what you did tonight was very brave, and that I wanted you to know that I stand by you and support you completely."

_Wow. Did Elliot Stabler just call me 'brave' and say that he 'supports me completely?' Did he… come here and say all that voluntarily? Either the world must be ending, or Elliot Stabler's world has ended._

"Well, thanks Elliot, I really appreciate that." Despite how tacky Elliot's words were it did comfort Olivia to know that her partner had come here to say them. "Well do you want to come in, I was just about to heat up some Chinese?" Olivia would normally never invite someone in to enjoy leftovers, but the rules of decency were quite different among SVU veterans who had endured all sorts of odd social encounters.

"Sure," Elliot said, a little too eagerly. "I um… had a fight with Kathy tonight so I haven't really eaten yet."

_Wait, why are you here exactly? I hope I'm not just your dinner back up plan. Well, I guess I'm glad to have the company so to hell with your true motives._

"All right we've got some top quality lo mein and beef fried rice, three minutes on high and it'll be like we're in Shanghai!"

"Just how I like it," Elliot said.

A few minutes later they sat down with the food and began eating around Olivia's countertop.

"So how is that Eldridge case going?" Elliot asked.

"Ugh, horrible. That peacock mother made me force Valessa to take a gynecological exam today, which she failed, verifying Valessa's defnese and disproving her mother's accusations. Nonetheless I later saw them in the West Plaza bickering. Her mother was causing a spectacle and obviously embarrassing Valessa, who got fed up and just ran off."

"Geez, that sounds horrible. I mean, I understand her concern to an extent. I'm paranoid like crazy about my girls dating or even going out to parties or clubs, but I keep my concern from making me act like an ass. I'm not that great at it, but I think that Ms. Eldridge has gone completely overboard."

"Tell me about it, I'm so fed up with her. But now that sex has been removed as a possibility I don't expect to see them again, which pisses me off because I'm afraid that'll leave Valessa to her mother's madness and I won't be able to do anything about it."

"You never know; a pair like that could end up back in the police station pretty easily."

"You're right but still. I'm just… I just feel really empathetic towards Valessa because my mother was a jerk to me a lot too, and I never had anyone to stand up for me. I want to stand up for her."

"Olivia, you know the law's on Ms. Eldridge's side. There is only so much we can do, and that's not very much."

"I know damnit, but that's just another reason why it irritates me so much. Valessa is being treated unfairly, and the only reason it's allowed to happen is because of an unfair system. A system that is _supposed_ to protect the rights and well-being of all involved."

"Hell, Liv, that's why I'm a cop, not a lawyer. I leave the legal hair-splitting to Alex and Casey and knock out perps when they tell me I can. I'd probably go mad if I had to remember all the twists and turns of our legal system."

"Yeah… it's just not good enough for me sometimes."

"Olivia you may have to just accept that you can't do anything more for her."

Olivia pictured the looming form of Ms. Eldridge cackling and laughing. She remembered her own mother and the hardships she had to endure because of her. She thought of the capricious power enforced by blind tradition which was the only thing that let it all happen.

"Fuck it Elliot. I don't have to accept it. I'm not going to accept it. If it means losing my badge then so be it. If there's something I can do to help her I'll do it, you can be fucking sure of that much." Olivia turned and stormed out of her apartment. It wasn't anger at Elliot so much as anger in general that drove her.

Elliot watched her go sadly. _God, Liv, I'm sorry. I know how it feels sometimes, to be helpless when you can and want to do what's right. Fucked up world._ His chest heaved in and out as he took a breath and shrugged. Elliot turned back to his and Olivia's food and continued eating, not one to let food go to waste.

Olivia walked. Her feet sliced through the shadows of lampposts. Dark buildings towered above her and cars raced down the street. The constant movement of the city was comforting to Olivia's upset feelings. Her steps carried her farther and farther out of the middle class apartment complexes into impoverished rundown areas. Trash littered the streets and graffiti was strewn across the cracked and broken walls of buildings. Various sounds disseminated through the building walls around her and mixed with the already raucous street life. Beggars and unkempt individuals wandered back and forth along the sidewalk, intermixed with overstressed mothers hurrying their children along. Drivers honked and yelled at one another. Shady individuals loitered. Olivia's sharp path cut through the clutter like a ray of light through a dark room.

Olivia walked on. For some reason being amidst suffering made her own suffering more tolerable. Seeing that she wasn't the only one who suffered made her own suffering easier.

A door slammed to her left. Olivia looked toward the source of the sound; it had come not from a door closing but from it being flung open and slamming against the cold concrete wall. A group of boys shoved a small boy through the open door followed him in and slammed the door closed again. Olivia turned and approached the door, not liking what see had seen.

"Yeah, now are you going to reconsider our offer?" a voice came from inside.

"Please- I've already told you my answer!"

"Yeah, well, let me ask again!" SLAM.

_Okay, you sons of bitches. You choose the wrong place to pick on someone weaker than you._

Olivia tried the door as the younger boy cried out in pain. _Locked, hmh, let's see if we can pick it._ Without hesitation Olivia pulled out her gun and fired straight through the doorknob into the adjacent wall. She kicked the door in and stormed inside, coming across the group of boys kicking the younger one as he lay on the ground. They had turned to stare wide-eyed after hearing the gunshot but Olivia didn't stop to ask questions. She shoved the first two away from her, into walls, and knocked the next two back as well, standing protectively over the younger boy and brandishing her gun around wildly.

"Look, fuckers, why don't you get the hell out of here and don't let me ever see you taking advantage of someone again!"

The boys didn't need another warning, they bolted as soon as Olivia finished speaking.

"You all right?" she asked as she helped the other boy up.

"Yeah," he managed. "It happens a lot, I'm used to it."

"Used to it? Why is that?" Olivia asked.

"I got with those guys to get in on some robberies, my family needed the money. But I soon became better at stealing than any of them, and quit out to run jobs on my own. They bust me up whenever the see me- they want me back. But I don't want to steal for them, I only steal because I have to-"

Police sirens interrupted the kid.

"Those faggots," he said, racing off.

"Wait!" Olivia cried. A moment later a police car pulled up to the alley and a familiar looking man got out. "Free- Olivia, what are you doing here?" John Munch asked.

"Me? What are _you_ doing around here?"

"Let's say I give you a ride back to your apartment and neither one of us explains what we're doing here."

"Deal," Olivia said smiling.

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